I wanted to share something with you tonight because I found myself feeling a little helpless, and it's not a feeling that I enjoy. I know I can make a different choice. I did make a different choice and that choice included sharing a new game with you.
Sometimes it's a game that we play without even thinking. Sometimes it is almost second nature because we do it so often. Have you ever played it? It's called the Blame Game. It is a game we play when we say things to ourselves or others like:
- I would have been on time except the phone rang as I was rushing out the door and then I hit every red light on the way here and the car in front of me was going wayyy below the speed limit and there was too much traffic for me to pass.
- I wouldn't have eaten that second piece of carrot cake tonight but someone put an empty bottle of salad dressing in the fridge so I didn't make that big salad to go with supper and I was still hungry.
- I would have finished my taxes on time but the phone was always busy when I called my bookkeeper/accountant and someone put my receipts in the wrong drawer.
I understand how easy it is to do. And no I didn't eat a second piece of carrot cake because my dog grabbed the container off the counter and ate it. It's obviously the dog's fault, I am not to blame for leaving it out!! ;)
The problem with this game is that it takes away our power. It makes us feel helpless and like things are out of our control. We give our power away to the ringing phone, the red lights, other people, and yes the dog too.
How would you like to play a new game? It might be less easy than the Blame Game at first but when we start to see that the next time we can make different choices, it helps us to see that we really do have all the control after all.
How can you take control today? How about in the above situations, do you see a new game that can be played? Maybe next time you'll choose to let the phone ring and check the message (if one is left) once you arrive at your destination. Or maybe you'll choose to leave 10 minutes early so that some extra traffic or a slow driver aren't seen as issues. And even when things do crop up, we always have the choice to allow it to make us feel or act a certain way. It does take practice, but I think it's a game worth trying.
P.S. The sweet dog in the photo is not the culprit who ate the carrot cake off the counter. The next time I will choose to put it in the fridge and not assume the last person to have a piece did it.